Music Journey

            I am a person with a big passion about music and my love for music is inherited from my mother. She is a music teacher and an English teacher in Vietnam. She usually has her piano class from Monday and Wednesday in the morning and her English class every evening except Sunday. When I was five years old, she discovered my love for music and decided to teach me how to play the piano. More than that, I usually sing along while playing the piano, which means not only I can play the piano, but I also can sing. Truly to say, I would rather sing than playing the piano. My childhood was full of music until the day I turned eighteen years old. I am now in the United States, continue my life with nursing as my major. However, when I first came here, I realized that not everything we want will become true.

            One day, when my mother and I were driving on the street, we saw a school named Soul Academy was under construction. I am a very curious person, especially my love for music had highly risen when I saw they put an announcement in front of the main door:” Soul Academy will be opened on June 20^th, 2013. All new students can register one performance such as dancing, singing, or any instrument you can play to get the first ten scholarships right in Soul Academy which value one thousand dollars.” Moreover, the person who opened that place is Thanh Bui. He is an Australian-Vietnamese musician and singer. He was known widely as a Vietnamese minority in the top 8 of the Australian Idol contest in 2008. And yes, he is the principal of the Soul Academy. I was really shocked when I saw his picture and his name in front of the construction. That was unbelievable. I have never imagined that one day I could meet my favorite idol. Afterwards, I ran faster inside, right at the register desk, quickly filled my name and all my information to contact in. I registered my name under the singing category with the song name Best of both worlds by Hannah Montana. The reason I chose that song is because Hannah Montana was the first TV show I watched on Disney Channel when I was a little kid. “Best of both worlds” means you can live with both normal life and music life.

Day after day, I could not even sleep because I was so anxious for that day to come. When my parents heard that I will perform a song in Soul Academy, they were extremely excited. They prepared for me many clothes that I can put on, shoes that I can try on, and my mom, she even took me to the most luxury salon near my home and asked them to do the best they can for me to have a best hairstyle ever. From that moment, I felt that I am so lucky to have them as my parent.  And I just want to say, from the bottom of my heart, I owe you two a “thanks”. In the evening, my parent called a taxi to take us to Soul Academy. It was crowded, extremely crowded. The other parents were very worried and took good care of their children just like my parent. After one hour settling down, there were two girls came and announced the party is now begin. I remembered there was a girl in a black dress sit next to me and asked me:

"Hey, are you nervous?" asked the girl.

I just smile and nodded my head. My name was called after eight contestants. Everything occurred smoothly but it was not like I expected. I was really myself when I sang that song. My parent even invited their friend to come and see me sing. They looked proud and I love that look. But that is not the best part. The best part is I lost even though I am the one who got the most compliments from him such as: "Great! That was what I am expecting. Amazing." or "You are born to be on stage." I did not hear my name in the reward part and I was disappointedly looking at the others with their gorgeous smiles and their rewards on their hand. Amazingly, I did not cry. A while after, I temporary put my disappointment aside and started to register for the singing class in Soul Academy. And I was luckily in Thanh Bui class.

 It was a sunny day up to one hundred and one Fahrenheit. My first singing class will start on next week, so I must drive to Soul Academy to look up to the schedule. I was extremely excited when I saw the schedule and the teacher’s name. I think I was dreaming but I was not because I saw my name in Thanh Bui’s class. That is unbelievable, right? Being in Thanh Bui’s class is not a normal thing. Student who are chosen by Thanh Bui must have a great potential. Afterward, I drove home as fast as I can so that I can tell mom what happened on that day. I ran upstairs, on the third floor, in the kitchen and yelled: “Mommy! Mommy! Do you know what just happened?”. My mom was cooking in the kitchen, preparing for our dinner so she did not even look at me but answered with a low tone voice:

“Hi sweetie? How is going?” – she answered tiredly and kept using the chopsticks to stir-fry the beef without looking at me. Well, maybe she was tired of cooking all day or something. I walked over her, gave her a tightly hug and said:

” Guess what? I am in Thanh Bui’s class. Oh my god, I cannot believe it mom!”. My mother paused for a minute, she dropped her chopsticks and said:

” What? Really? Are you serious, sweetie?” Are you sure?”. 

“Yes, mom.”

Thanh Bui was the target that I would always ready to strive for. A year later, I graduated with a singing degree after completing Thanh Bui’s class. Moreover, I also searched some opportunities with a desire to join in someone’s band. Ho Chi Minh city is a place where people share their ambitious about music with each other. It has many locations with different and diverse acoustic music coffee shops. Many bands are registered at different locations to perform with different music themes. I remembered my dad once told me:” If you never stop searching, great opportunity will come to you.” One day, when I was in my summer break. I joint a club named “Nguoi tim band – Band tim nguoi”. It is a group where people find places, events, or opportunities for their band to have a chance to perform. More than that, show mans are always seeking many talented bands to perform at the event they organized.  I saw some bands posted a status on that group that they are looking for a new vocalist to join their band, the rest was looking for a vocalist that can sing their genre music. I accidentally joined a band named “The Mask band”. The leader of that band was looking for a new vocalist because his recent vocalist had left the band with some personal issue. I immediately texted the leader of the band and quickly received his approval. He told me to be ready for the audition and I asked:” What? An audition?”. 

“Yes. Of course. The purpose of this audition is to test your ability.” – answered the leader of the band.

I felt very relief and less nervous because Thanh Bui had trained me how to solve the tricky situation while singing very carefully in his class. I texted him back to confirm the time and location that I am going to be there on our first meeting. Two days later, I drove to the address he gave me. It was a beautiful coffee shop with flowers decorated everywhere. After two minutes, there was a guy with a curly black long hair heading toward me in a blue t-shirt and denim jeans, behind his back is a big guitar covered by a leather black case. Alright, the leader of the band is a guitarist also? How cool? We greeted each other and introduced our self. The leader of the band named Nguyen, he is twenty- two years old. He then recalled his memories of how he quitted his high school to start his music career. We headed to the room inside the coffee shop after talking for a while.  There were two more people in the room. One was a guitarist who specialized in playing bass and the other was the cajonist, who specialized in playing drums. We do not usually call the person who plays drum a drummer, we always call that person “cajonist”. I friendly greeted two of them and quickly started my audition. I chose “Price Tag” by Jessi J to open the audition. We had a great time with each other. After the audition, I shared my ambitious of how I wanted to join a band so that I can have fun with the others and express my desire to sing on stage. However, I felt happier when the cajonist said:

” You have a great voice. Young and talented. That is what we are looking for.”

I felt embarrassed in happiness. The cajonist named Nhan. He is four ages older than me and looks very handsome. He is sweet, friendly and delicate. He always shows his attention to me. He even told me to text him if I have any question because he always there to reply my text. From that moment, I have never imagined that I would meet these people in my life, especially Nhan, I could not stop thinking about him after the audition.

  Nothing special happened after that day. Instead of staying home, I became hard-working, practiced singing more regularly, and got used to controlling my voice while on stage. However, Nhan and I were deeply in love with each other. One day, we went to Bui Vien to eat my favorite rice paper with salted shrimp. He suddenly told me that I looked so pretty in long hair and he loved my personality, the way I treated people in the band and especially him. After that, he kissed me lightly and said that he wanted me to be his girlfriend and he loved me. What? I was shocked! That was unbelievable!!! Unacceptable! Why? Because I was planning to confess my love for him, how I like him from the day we first met and how he looks so adorable plus the way he treated me so kindly. However, of course, I said yes after thinking for a few minutes. Afterwards, I asked him what makes he loves me because I want to know what I have that make you love me.

“Hahaha! You are so cute. Well, what should I say? You are beautiful, you smart, friendly, and especially your voice makes me cannot stop listening. You know what? I could not even fall asleep after the day I met you.” – he answered and hug me in his arms.

I dated Nhan for half a year, then we broke up. Why? You know, life is not what we dreamt. We had many great times together but one day, I found out that he was still dating his ex-girlfriend. Isn’t it funny? As I remember, Nhan and his ex-girlfriend had dated for six years. I do not know what tragic event they went through, but they had broken up several times. It was a rainy day, Nguyen, the leader of the band asked me to go somewhere to eat. I texted him back immediately and got dressed up quickly. He came over my house to pick me up, then we went to eat pizza. I eat pizza every day! To be honest, not every day but almost every day! I especially love “Pizza Hut” because the way they make the pizza is less oil than other places. They also have mozzarella crust and salted crust which I am extremely addicted to. Nguyen and I went in Pizza Hut and got seated by the waiter quickly. We ordered a Meat Lover’s Pizza and a Cheese Pizza topped with pineapples and olives on top. We talked and complained about troubles we encounter in our life for a bit then started to eat. Five minutes later, I did not believe what I saw but sadly to say, I saw Nhan holding a girl hand, heading torward the exit door. I stood up hurriedly, ran after them despite everybody were looking at me. However, they had gone when I arrived. I went back inside like a person who just lost the soul and started to cry. Surprisingly, Nguyen has already known about Nhan’s biggest secret! He wiped my tears away and said:

“Hey! Do not be sad. He is not worth for you to cry over him. I had known about this for a long time.”

“Know about what!?” – I responded uncontrollably. 

“About Nhan still dates his ex-girlfriend while dating you.” – he still helped me to wipe up my tears and answered.

“Wow! Wait! What? How come did not you tell me? Why do you do that? How did you know?” 

“Just like you. I suddenly saw him and his ex-girlfriend were holding hands to the movie theater. They looked happy. I thought that you guys have broken up already but when you are on stage, performing, I saw you looked at him lovingly.” – he answered me with a small voice.

Later, Nhan texted me and asked what I was doing when I just got home. Such a liar! I turned off my phone and quickly went to sleep. Two weeks later, I cancelled all band’s activities, saying that I am sick so I cannot make it. Nhan kept texting me and asked me that why I did not answer him, why I avoided him. But, please! He knows where my home is, he can come to see me whenever he wants but he did not. A week later, I texted him saying that I want to break up with him. He called me, asked me what happened. I hung up and said nothing. I just texted him back “Have fun with your ex-girlfriend. I am fine.”

We did not see each other anymore from that day. My band and I started to work on a new project. I also had more chances to perform at many luxury weddings and conferences thanks to Nguyen’s help. Everything was back to normal again. To be honest, I feel very comfortable for not being in any serious relationship. I love the fact of being single. I can do whatever I want and go wherever I want to go. And day by day, my passion for music is getting more intense and I started to lose control, my life became imbalanced, especially my studying. My mom started to get angry and disappointed of me because I neglected my study in school. She also asked me why I was always away from home and not even socialize when I was at home. I just said:” I am ok. There is nothing wrong with me. Do not get me wrong.” My mom looked like:” Great! Fine. You cannot see what other people see at you.” Well, we had not talked for two weeks – two weeks – to me which is a very long time. Even now, I still feel very regretful for not talking to my mom during those two weeks. She is a very delightful person, a dedicated and super-great mom; how could I not even talk to her or care about her even if she did not talk to me? Then, my mom decided to send me to the United States to study. More than that, the reason my mom did that not only because of the “study” thing. I also seeing another person after breaking up with Nhan. I met a new guy in school and dated him. His name is Huy. I found out that he also plays the guitar and knows a little bit about piano. We spent three hours talking. We dated and were never separate. Mom knows that I date him, but she seems do not like him much. You know, people cannot balance their life with so many things distracted them and so am I. At that time, I felt like I had nothing to do with my life except singing and dating. I completely forgot that I have to do my homework like other people, prepare for exam and be nervous when I get bad grades. But I did not. Moreover, she wants me to major in business. I planned my future was going to be like that. I can work at a business company in the morning and be a singer at the night time. But the point is, my mom wants me to completely major in business and stop all music activities. That day came. My mom finally bought a ticket and I only had two weeks left in Vietnam to say goodbye to all my friends, my co-singers, my guitarist, my drummers, and many things that I have been used to for eighteen years. Luckily, I got an C overall for the last semester in my report card. The day I went to the airport, I planned not to cry because I thought there was nothing to cry about. I thought that I just go study for a specific time and I will be back. Right? But I am wrong. Totally wrong! Everybody was there for me to say goodbye. Especially mom, she was very cruel of pushing me to the United States, alone. But anyway, I still love her. No matter what happened, she will always be my mom, the most wonderful person in the world who always sacrifices for her daughter. I then hug my friends, my co-workers, and Huy. He looked sad. He gave me a tight hug, wished me to stay healthy. He said that he would wait for me to complete my study and then we would go to a new step of our relationship. I would love to imagine how it will be but I was not in a good mood.

I am now in Houston, Texas, majoring in Nursing. Actually, I was going to majored in Business, but I want to try something new. I become hard-working and I always ready to finish all the homework at school whenever I get back home from school. My relationship with my mother is getting better now. I also broke up with Huy because nobody can maintain a “long-distance relationship” in a long time no matter how hard we try. Furthermore, I gave up my passion for music. Not finally giving up, but almost eighty percent already. In a new country, it is really hard to maintain what I used to do in my home country. Houston does not have many places like Vietnam to go drinking and enjoy the music. Even if it does, I do not even know anyone who wants to form a band like I used to do in Vietnam. And that it is, life is not what we dreamt of, but I am glad that I have learnt a lot when I come to the United States. 

            Writing this memoir make me feel comfortable because I can express all the sadness and happiness through writing. And I am very glad that one day, I can print out this memoir and pass it to my children for them to know about how my life was when I was their ages.